toxic relationships Tag

The Top 7 Reasons We Stay in Bad Relationships

By Vishnu

“Some of us think that holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go.” ~Hermann Hesse

She knew it sooner than I did. And more intensely than I did.

I, on the other hand, may have considered our differences but never thought of them as deal-breakers. I tried to justify the many struggles we had between us and believed that our marriage could work despite the challenges.

I had this feeling things would get better and stayed hopeful no matter how bad our relationship got.

I told myself that her extraverted personality and my more introversion could work together.

When the Euphoria Fades: Dealing with the Highs and Lows of Love

By Hannah Brooks

“We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.” ~Sam Keen

When we fall in love, we feel excited to experience some of the most joyful moments of our lives. Because love is supposed to be the source of the best feelings, right? But what about when that relationship churns up some hard stuff and leaves you feeling hurt, annoyed, sad, and irate?

For many of us, especially deep-feelers like me, when we start to experience these inevitable lows in our relationship,

Great Things Can Come from Letting Go (and Other Lessons from Infidelity)

By Kayla Albert

“Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.” ~C.S. Lewis

My eyes leapt open sometime after 2am and, after feeling the empty space next to me, I knew.

The cell phone I laid on the pillow beside my head was silent, my previous text messages left unanswered. Panic swelled in my throat as I frantically dialed his number, calls separated by no more than thirty seconds.

Checking phone logs and driving past houses at night had never been something I pictured myself doing.

How to Let Go of Resentment and Forgive Your Ex

By Tiffaney Kennedy

“I used to be afraid of the pain letting go of the past would cause, until I realized how much pain holding on has caused.” ~Steve Maraboli

Getting over the pain of a bad relationship is never easy.

Even when I finally felt more in control of my feelings, the pain from my past would still spill over into my present.

I would constantly compare my new partner to my ex who had torn my heart apart. Even though I had moved on from that relationship, I was too afraid to fully trust my new partner for fear of being backstabbed again.

Why Insecurity & Approval-Seeking Lead to Unhealthy Relationships

By Lauren Golombek

“Your relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship you have.” ~Robert Holden

As a child I was carefree and enthusiastic. Aren’t most kids? At some point, though, life began to impact me and to affect how I felt about myself.

For as long as I can remember, I was a chubby kid. I began using food as a means of coping, and my family didn’t seem to see it as an issue. Coming from an Italian family, food was correlated with love.

As I moved into my adolescent years,

What I’ve Realized Since Being Cheated On

By Chris Schurke

“Sometimes walking away is the only option because you finally respect yourself enough to know that you deserve better.” ~Unknown

When I was cheated on, I was hit by an ongoing blizzard of conflicting emotions.

There were the initial tears that I failed to hide from anyone. There was a cold ruthlessness as I told her that I couldn’t be with her after what she did. There was a wave of misery, there was a wave of anger, and all of it was dotted with periodic moments of calm and even gratitude that she was finally out of my life.

If You Always Date People Who Aren’t Good for You, Read On

By Renée Suzanne

“I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions.” ~Stephen Covey

Just a few short years ago, I sat across the table from a lovely man on a first date. It had taken a couple months to get there due to our busy schedules, but it seemed to be worth it. He was easy to talk to and seemed like a great guy.

During the course of the evening, we discussed what we were looking for and he told me that he was still married,

Are You Really Listening? 4 Ways to Understand and Connect with People

By Lianna G. Ruben

“The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them.” ~Ralph G. Nichols

My partner and I were in our first few months of a long-distance relationship. This was a new stage for us and it meant altering our communication practices. Instead of sharing meals and museum exhibits, we had weekly emails and Skype chats.

Every week, I would pour my heart into long, detailed emails to him. I would describe everything that I had done and thought over the past few days.

3 Questions to Ask Yourself When You Feel Unsupported in Relationships

Many of us feel we’re not getting the support we want or deserve in relationships.

Maybe we’ve never felt supported by our friends or family. Maybe we don’t feel supported by our peers or co-workers. Maybe we don’t even feel supported by our partner.

This can leave us feeling drained, tired, and unhappy, like we’re moving through life without much fuel to keep going.

During my adolescence and early adulthood, this was a huge struggle for me. I rarely found a place or group of friends where I felt like I “belonged” and,

Ending the Cycle of Breaking Up and Getting Back Together

“As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.” ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Almost all of my romantic relationships have had some kind of long ending. At some point I’ve gained clarity on the relationship, I’ve acknowledged the truth that it’s not working out, and then I’ve ended it.

I would like to say that was the end of the story, that I moved on each time with peace and ease. But the reality is that I second-guessed myself and ended up excusing all of my partners’ faults to justify giving them another chance.